How to Say Goodbye

Advocacy & Change

May 29, 2020

When my youngest was still in elementary school, she began the countdown to summer vacation with so much eager anticipation that one would have thought she hated school.

She didn’t. She just loved summer, too. This was evidenced by the fact that each year, on the last day of school, she would step off of the school bus and promptly burst into tears, right in the middle of the street.

“I’m going to miss my teacher,” she’d whisper. “I’m going to miss my friends.”

I was reminded of this each day this week as friends posted photos of their masked faces from inside of the classrooms they left frozen in amber so many weeks ago. March’s lunch count remained scribbled on whiteboards. Windows were still dressed with shamrocks.

None of you expected this, and neither did your students.

Last week, a friend messaged me on social, asking if I’d be willing to write today’s post. I didn’t want to disappoint her. I don’t want to disappoint you, either. Everyone seems to be asking how to say goodbye to the students they never had enough time with this year.

Who knows if this will help. I’m not sure what will, right now.

For what it’s worth, I’m finding that writing into all of this uncertainty is rather grounding. The last week felt harder than those that came before it, here in COVID times. If there was any kind of bargaining inside of my grief cycle, I’ve moved past that for now. This is feeling like reality, and it isn’t one that I or anyone chose.

So, I’m choosing to keep writing and sharing and showing up where I can, and I’m going to keep doing the work I love for the people I love, no matter what. I hope that you are, too.

This is how we take care of each other.

How to say goodbye:

Say goodbye in a way that invites your students to share their feelings and the most important things they’ve learned from spending time together.

Say goodbye in a way that lets them know you’re always with them, and that if they need you, you’ll still be there.

Say goodbye in a way that fills them with hope.

I hope that if you have other ideas to share, you’ll add them in the comments below or come find me on Facebook or Twitter. I have no idea how to say goodbye to the students you were separated from in the middle of a global pandemic. No one covered this in undergrad or graduate school, and even the last twenty five years couldn’t have prepared us well for this moment.

Let them know you love them and that you’re easy to find.

Let them love you back right now, too.

Are you a writing teacher who is looking for a bit of camaraderie, the opportunity to share the challenges you’re facing, and a few brilliant minds to help you overcome them? I’ve been hosting a meetup each Sunday evening at 7 pm EST on Zoom. If you’d like to participate, just join my mailing list. The invite will be included in this Sunday’s newsletter, along with a bunch of other goodies that you might enjoy. Subscribe here.

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All Images: Copyright Laura Stockman, 2020

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